He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
He needs to seriously stop texting me at 3am for sex. Late night and early morning hours are for the guys who DON'T bust a nut in the first 5 minutes of making out.
Yeah minute men are best for late afternoons when you're inbetween running errands and have nothing to do.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
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