Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
Just drug him and when he wakes up say "You just woke up from a coma, we've been married for 5 years." It'll be like The Vow but fucked up.
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
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