he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
You handed J your Mayan-pocalypse shopping list and told him he wasn't getting laid unless he brought everything on it. Where is he supposed to get a live goat?!
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
This week I fucked a police officer and called both the Senators from the state I'm in and the one I'm moving to. What have you done since the election?
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Randomize
