spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
you have to choose: penises or morals?
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
That awkward moment when you realize that last night you walked from in n out to petco, bought a mouse for $3, named it mogar, taught it how to skateboard on a techdeck, made it a home out of a trash can, fed it fruity pebbles and cheese, and then forgot where you left it.
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
Randomize
