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• (541): View more from Oregon

  What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?

  (503): View more from Oregon

  3some

  (541): View more from Oregon

  You're right, stupid question.

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• (619): View more from California

  There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.

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• (425): View more from Washington

  if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you

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• (720): View more from Colorado

  He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.

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  These 19 Men’s Fashion Mistakes are Unforgivable, According to Women

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (402): View more from Nebraska

  You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.

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• (512): View more from Texas

  Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.

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• (317): View more from Indiana

  Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.

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• (443): View more from Maryland

  I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.

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• (313): View more from Michigan

  Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.

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  25 Cringeworthy Below the Pants Injuries

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• (330): View more from Ohio

  Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.

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• (516): View more from New York

  Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM

  (973): View more from New Jersey

  I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std

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• (803): View more from South Carolina

  I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.

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• (518): View more from New York

  Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub

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• (269): View more from Michigan

  the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.

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• (925): View more from California

  We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"

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