I woke up this morning under my fitted sheet and my legs through the sleeves of my sweater.
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
I've never used poorer judgment in my life. It's mathematically possible that I impregnated 5 women in the past 24 hours since I won the lottery. But I couldn't be happier about it.
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
Randomize
