Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
Before I go in, is 'I just got a root canal 2 hours ago' a good excuse to show up drunk to yoga class with a 6 pack? Because if not I think I need to go home.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
Randomize
