i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
It is NEVER not funny to me when I am sitting at a table and I've touched the dicks of every single person I'm sitting with.
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