omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
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