WTF. you left me with no condoms and you ate all my mac and cheese. scumbag.
after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
So, I'm roughly 90% sure that the guy next to me in the xray waiting room is watching porn on his phone right now
Randomize