am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
Fuck. I just got my nipple tweaked by a plus size drag queen in a purple dress. I feel like I got molested by Grimace.
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
Randomize
