i just pissed myself at work. maybe they'll buy the old coffee spill trick
Moan for me like Helen Keller
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
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