so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
I DO have hobbies! I drink. I drink more. I catfish men on Grindr with photos of guys who are less attractive than me. I listen to Lovecraftian podcasts. I'm very well-rounded.
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
Randomize
