Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
Apparently drunk me was getting hit on and i wasn't into it so i shouted "Stupify" at him like i was fucking harry potter then went to the pizza place next to the bar and punted some guys pizza box out of his hands. :(
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
Randomize
