dude you need to get laid
me?
no, the other guy who hasn't been laid in 7 months
oh I thought you were talkin about me
wait
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
Randomize
