She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
PS if you want to hear something hilarious as my little sister was showing me her engagement ring I open a Snapchat from R and it's literally a dick pic. Very different points in our life
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
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