I can't breathe out the right side of my face
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
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