yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
So awkward... The newspaper lady just caught me sitting stoned in my driveway at 5 am and asked if I was okay. I'm way better than ok right now
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
Just walk of shamed past a 5 year old on my way out of my booty call. He waved at me. Is this the single life I've been missing?
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
The power of my boobs compel you
Why did my mother make you get naked?
I am mentally ready for anal.
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
Randomize
