David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
Shout out to this stomach virus for helping me prepare for whatever slutty Halloween costume I decide to wear.
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
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