told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
Let's be real. I'm the Usain Bolt of running away after hookups. Fastest (wo)man alive.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
Let the clothes fall where they may.
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
Randomize