Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
You had a beer at 10:30 this morning?
Ya, I didn't have any Tylenol.
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
Too much gin, very little bucket
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
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