if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
Randomize
