I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
You wore a man's plastic top hat last night.
No I didn't. Whiskey did.
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
Randomize
