It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
My parents worry about me having parties when they go on vacation. Umm no it just means I'm drinking and smoking alone on the first floor of the house instead of the second
Hashtag Pathetic
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
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