best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
Women are like Alzheimers patiens. You can compliment them a million times in a day, but the next day is always a wash, you have to start all over.
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
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While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
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this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
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