dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
I'm at breakfast at my kid's school and I have noted at least 3 other parents with last night's red wine mouth and bleary eyes. I don't know why I always get so paranoid.
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
Randomize
