Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can someone please remind me later tonight that there's a taco in my purse. I may get drunk and forget I put it there
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
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