I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
Randomize
