Sponge bath it is.
My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
You slammed your face into the toilet and declared you were moving your bed into the bathroom in the morning. Also, you insisted on crawling everywhere because feet are "overrated."
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
Randomize
