At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
Turns out my GF and my FWB have a mutual friend. Yada yada yada, I need to crash on your couch
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