Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Randomize