Define "chronic" masturbator.
I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
Randomize
