i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
God I love dating single dads. They've got their shit at least a little bit together and there's always snacks after sex. #nakedfruitrollups
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