we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
Randomize
