It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
Randomize
