My room smells like vodka and shame
He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me.
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
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