ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
In a bar surrounded by couples hooking up. I'm just staring at one. Not drunk enough. Come save me.
40s are totally the cure
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
Randomize
