And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
When I told her I was deaf and took my hearing aids out at night to sleep, she said it must be nice not having to hear drunken roommates having awkward sex late at night.
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
Randomize
