Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
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