Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
Randomize
