They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
the back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." my palm read, "say yes to shots." when the fuck did I write that?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
Probably for the best. My morning wood is pretty horrible. I wouldn't want to tip the earth's axis/ create a new magnetic pole
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
I need a beard to bite.
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
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