they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
Question #1: Why am I on my living room floor? Question #2: Where did the bloody footprints come from? Question #3: Why are there two McChickens next to the wine bottle?
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
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