I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
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