im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
The housekeeper found my huge dildo under the bathroom sink, and another in the living room. I can't get much more single than this.
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
Randomize
