You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
Im at a strip club, and the dancer just farted into my face. The bad part about that is I could taste the wings I bought her earlier
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
Randomize
