omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
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