They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
Is there a non-awkward way to tell a girl I work with that she looks just like my favourite pornstar?
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
Randomize
