Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Randomize
