Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
I am full of burrito and curiosity
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
Guy in the room next to us in the ER is chanting "I'm jeff and I'm drunk". He's trying to get released to finish tailgating for the Iowa game that starts in 9 hours.
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
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