I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
I'm confused about why you felt the need to ask me to buy you life alert for christmas at 3:28 this morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
Randomize